Wednesday, July 20, 2011

The Protective Homeschool Mother

 

puppies

 

This was a post I wrote awhile back on www.latter-dayhomeschooling.com

I thought it would go well with the whole LDS Parenting theme, and also, I really really wanted to tell you guys about www.latter-dayhomeschooling.com because it’s not just for homeschool parents. The website is amazing for all parents. Oh, and the owner of the website. She’s my friend. But I’m not being biased. It really is an amazing site. So go check it out. Now, on to the regularly scheduled post………

My daughter Sydney has a love of puppies. She has a treehouse tent in her room and inside of that tent, she keeps her 19 stuffed puppies and 1 stuffed wolf. At night, she sleeps in her tent, right at the front of it, so no one can get in or out. I asked her why she does that when she has a perfectly fine bed. She looked at me like I was crazy! " I'm their mother, I have to protect them!"

She had recently read a book about how dogs in the wild sleep in caves and protect their young. So of course, since she is their mother, she feels the need to sleep in her "cave" and protect " her young". She's going to be a great momma one day.
In the homeschooling world, you will hear alot words like, socialization and overprotective and backwards.

 
People who do not homeschool, sometimes think that children who do homeschool are not socialized, are socially backwards, etc. They sometimes will assume that homeschool mothers are overprotective. There have been countless books written on these subjects. I am not going to get into the whole socialization thing here in this post, but I do want to talk about the job and responsibility of homeschool mothers to "protect their young."

 
In all honestly, it is not just homeschool mothers who have this responsibility. It is every LDS parent. We have been counseled over and over, to teach our children, to protect them. To nurture them and lead them and guide them. Do I feel like an overprotective mom because I homeschool my children? You bet I do. I would be that way even if I didn't homeschool my children. Do I let my kids play outside in the neighorhood with other kids, yup! Do I let my kids go to public school and learn about the "real world", nope. Why?? Because they are KIDS!!


My 6 year old neighbor recently came over to play at our house. She then proceeded to give me and my children a sex ed lesson. Along with lifting her shirt to show us. I asked her where she learned that. From her big sister and the kids at school. I had to have a talk with her mom. Am I overprotective? You bet. I take my job as a mother very seriously. Im sure that the other mother thought I was being overprotective. But I felt that my 8,7 and 5 year old didn't need to hear those words in that way. They needed to hear them from their loving mother and father, at the right time in their development.
This past general conference has amazed me. Never in all of my 29 years (ok, we will say 19 years, lets be honest here, I dont really remember the first 10 conferences I watched!!) have I heard such a beautiful, inspirational conference focusing on how important families are. It was obviously something that our Heavenly Father wanted us to hear. Quotes on how parents must resolve that teaching in the home is a most sacred and important responsibility. Quotes on mothers teaching their children values, standards, and doctrines. So much more, I can't even begin to quote them all. Are we being overprotective by teaching our children at home. I really don't think so, because we are doing what Heavenly Father has asked us to do. Are we being overprotective by not sending our children out into the harsh "real world" at age 3??? No. It is fine for some families, but not for mine.

 
You see, I am a fierce momma wolf, and I must protect my young. I must do everything I can for my children. I must sleep at the mouth of the cave and make sure they have a happy childhood full of good experiences, a home that is a haven, and the opportunity to learn everything they can in a loving atmosphere. Go and read through the General Conference... it is amazing. Pray hard, and when you feel that you are being overprotective or not giving your children "real world" experiences, pray hard about it. We must be in the world, that is true, don't become a recluse, but we must not be of the world.

1 comment:

Karla said...

This is a good article, and it sounds like you are doing a good job of protecting your children, just exactly as you should, as all parents should. I have to comment on a couple of small, but important, points, though.

You wrote "Do I feel like an overprotective mom because I homeschool my children? You bet I do. [Emphasis mine.] I would be that way even if I didn't homeschool my children. Do I let my kids play outside in the neighorhood with other kids, yup! Do I let my kids go to public school and learn about the "real world", nope. Why?? Because they are KIDS!!"

and

" I had to have a talk with her mom. Am I overprotective? You bet. [Again, emphasis mine.] I take my job as a mother very seriously."

Good for you! So why would you feel overprotective in these situations? You are doing precisely what you are supposed to do: protecting your children from harmful situations. That is being rightfully "protective", not "overprotective". By assigning the "overprotective" idea to normal, correct mother-doing-her-job-well behavior, you are giving aid and support to the enemy! ;-)

By that, I mean that someone who is looking for evidence that homeschoolers (or any careful parents who properly protect their children) are being overprotective could look at the statements I quoted and say, "See? Here's proof. She even admits she's 'overprotective'!" They are wrong, of course, but please don't provide extra firepower for them. Claim your rightful adjective -- protective -- and reject their mislabelling "overprotective" term.

The other thing I wanted to mention is about your statement, "Are we being overprotective by not sending our children out into the harsh "real world" at age 3??? No. It is fine for some families, but not for mine." [Emphasis mine.]

There are, unfortunately, some parents who may have little choice about putting their three-year-olds in day-care, but it is not "fine" for them. It is every bit as harmful for their children as it would be for yours, or for my grandchildren, or for any children of careful, rightfully protective parents.

The six-year-old you mentioned is evidence of that. If it is not a good thing for her to expose your children to the event you described, it is even worse for adults to expose her -- and all the other "hers" and "hims" out there -- to the same inappropriate "education". Shame on those adults for being grossly underprotective!