Thursday, July 14, 2011

Parenting is actual WORK !

caution sign

When I first got pregnant with my first child, I became a parenting book freak. I read every book I could get my hand on. I still am a bit obsessed with parenting, I admit it.

I was prepared for the work side of raising a child. The diapers, the feedings, the burping, the carrying of car seats and packing of diaper bags. As the toddler years came I was prepared for the carrying of heavy child, the repacking of diaper bags, potty-training, etc.

Why didn’t anyone tell me that there is a whole other side of the work of parenting?? If you are one of those parents who can sit in a chair, hear your kids fighting , then scream at them to stop, AND THEY STOP—you totally rock!!! Parenting is actual WORK! The child training, the discipline, the teaching of correct habits, and have I mentioned the whole sibling issues? You have to be consistent, you have to get up! I love the show Supernanny. So do my kids, which is always fun, because one day I think, “I hope they don’t get any ideas” and then the next time I think, “ wow, now they know what will happen if they try that!” Anyway, so many of the parents, well, they are lazy! They don’t get that parenting is actual WORK!! I have worked hard and so has my husband, to make sure we are doing what we call “active parenting”. I might have made that term up- although I don’t think I did. lol. So, when one of our children makes a mistake, we have tried to actively get up and teach them the proper thing to do, kindly, and patiently. We don’t sit there and yell, clean it up, or stop. Unfortunately it doesn’t work for us to do that, because if it did work, I’d probably do it! Because of this “active parenting” I think it’s really working for us. The kids aren’t stressed or scared if they make a mistake, because they know we all make mistakes, they know what to do if there is a spill, or a mess, or something like that. They’ve been taught repeatedly. If they have a question, they know they can come to mommy and daddy and we will try our best to answer their question, and if we don’t know the answer, we find out! Please don’t think Im saying we are perfect parents, oh my heavens, wouldn’t that be amazing!!!! But , I was thinking this morning as I was trying to lay down for a minute ( yes, that is lazy, but yes I have a good reason), and my children were playing nicely, then my autistic daughter had a huge meltdown, as I pulled myself up, to go actively take care of it, I realized that I’m exhausted, and parenting is WORK!!!! I thought I would get on here and kind of vent and talk about it a bit.

Has anyone else found that it takes major work to be a good parent?? Not just the physical side of it too, but the prayer, the emotions, the decisions?? Why don’t babies come with a caution sign?? CAUTION- THIS CHILD REQUIRES WORK!!!!!!!!!

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Thanks for taking the time to comment! It helps me to know what to write about, what you like and what you don't like! Have a fantastic family day! :) Love, JL